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2006-08-24, 7:40 p.m.

My mom has been talking for a long time about getting rid of her house. Frankly, I'm amazed that she's kept it as long as she has, one way or another. But she's been talking about it, and I've started not to believe her anymore. I guess she's serious about it this time. Seems like events have been set into motion that probably can't be undone. So, sometime in the next year, the house will no longer be a part of my life.

But that's for later-me to worry about...

Currently, I'm feeling a few pangs of guilt over the way I reacted (or didn't) to her telling me. I had a feeling when she wanted to come over after work that she wasn't feeling very "up" today. I didn't think too much of it because Mom gets lonely sometimes, and I don't mind her coming over anyway. It wasn't until she was about to leave that she brought it up. I really only just said, "Oh." I believe she's feeling a bit guilty herself about letting it go and my initial thoughts were that a reaction from me that showed any kind of hurt or anger at the situation would only make her feel worse. I stand by that--I think it would've been really bad for her had I started to cry or something along those lines. Looking back, though, I think I showed a little too much indifference. She progressively got more upset as she got closer to leaving, and I have a hunch that she probably cried through her drive home. I'm sorry for that, but there was no right thing for me to say. I'm not pleased with it, but I hope it will be better for her, in the end. I'm a little pissed that since it's not really feasible for us to buy a house right now, that neither of my parents have one either (my dad and stepmom have a condo). I just would like Jack to know that not everyone lives in an apartment or similar situation. My in-laws have a house of course, but as I've always said, things with them are not as good as they ought to be. My husband just doesn't have a close family.

I don't even know what kind of apartment my mom is going to be able to get with her credit. One of the things I hated most about moving was trying to find a place that was reasonably affordable where I was going to feel secure. Even still this place is only just "good enough" on both counts. Here we go again.

More later...

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Women... And stuff... - 2012-08-19
Sniffles - 2012-08-18
Time to kill while waiting for a late dinner... - 2012-08-11
0.0 - 2012-08-05
Locked and Isolated in BlogLand - 2012-08-03

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