new | old | Private Archives | profile | rings | cast | email | book | notes | Blip | host | image | design

Mood:
Watching:
Reading:

Lemony New Year's Day
2011-01-02, 1:13 a.m.

Today/Yesterday (1/1/11), after starting out like the kind of first day of a year that does not suggest one cares to see any of the rest of said year, ended pretty well. When I woke up this morning, I had no drive/desire/intention of getting out of bed at all. After learning that some plans I had made were falling through, all I could think of was still sending the kids to the grandparents and then coming back home and hiding in the dark, quiet house... Alone. Thankfully, I further decided that such a course of action would be dreadfully unhealthy to myself and potentially disappointing to my closest friends, who are on a very short list of people that I do not question whether or not they truly care for me in the way that their position in my life suggests that they would. Such wordy sentences those are. Sum it up to say: Lemons to Lemonade today--and thank God for that.

Been thinking about something else since I sat down at the computer and saw my friend, Brandon, online in Facebook. Brandon is a strange bird, and one of a handful of people I've known who is capable of so much more than what they've allowed themselves to become in life. Anyway, his rough--but wise--advice that he gave me a few days ago is what I've been thinking about. It went a step beyond, "Heather, what the fuck are you doing?" that is the general script, theme or final thought of many of the similar conversations I've had over the past couple of weeks. His added perspective was, "Heather what you're doing is essentially nothing--you would be well to treat it as such. You don't want to be the only person in the situation to whom it is nothing, so don't be. Look out for number one and be smart about it." Okay--that was all paraphrased and summarized, punctuated with the final advice, "Just be careful, Darlin." Yes, there indeed has been an abundance of leaping before looking and throwing caution to the wind. Gah... What the fuck are you doing, Heather?

This is what happens, by the way, when a woman is left alone with her thoughts--and third, fourth and fifth-party advisors--for an extended period of time. Maintaining a complicated situation does require a bit of actual "maintenance." I'm jussayin'.

The standard array of horoscopes that I peruse on a given day all seem to say something similar for today (1/2/11), which I hope I remember in the heat of whatever moments the day will bring. Emphasis on communication for today, but be careful and hang onto your poker face.



last - next

Women... And stuff... - 2012-08-19
Sniffles - 2012-08-18
Time to kill while waiting for a late dinner... - 2012-08-11
0.0 - 2012-08-05
Locked and Isolated in BlogLand - 2012-08-03





Lilypie 3rd Birthday Ticker

Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker




i'm in ravenclaw!
be sorted @ nimbo.net
Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com